It turns out that love is somewhat like narcotic. Love becomes addictive, produces physical and physiological dependence and even withdrawal syndrome. Scientists at British National Centre for Narcology have come to that point. After they’d conducted many studies and interviewed lovers, scientists discovered that outburst of love caused the physiological changes in brain similar to those under cocaine or heroine.
In the first place, love and narcotics produce the same biochemical reactions in our body. For example, affectionate emotions are followed by release of dopamine that changes the activity of certain brain centers and causes the development of other physiological reactions and sensations. As dopamine content in the nerve tissue drops below its normal level, people experience depression symptoms, or they develop withdrawal syndrome. It’s the same with drug addicts.
Researches say, though, “physiological” nature of love means that love can’t last forever because neurophysiological changes accompanying human emotions dwindle in about 5-7 years.
Couples often fight about daily household issues. She just wants him to clear away dishes after the meal while he wants nobody to bother him when he’s watching TV during the meal. British physiologists have conducted a poll to find out what annoys women about male behavior in the kitchen. Now, you might recognize some “items” that annoy you.
32% of women hate it when men litter the kitchen while they are cooking. 30% of women can’t stand when their husbands leave unwashed dishes in the sink. 19 % of women quarrel with men about overflowing garbage cans, and 16% – about not putting food in the fridge.
It turns out that 85% of women are unhappy about their husbands’ kitchen habits.
It annoys most women that their husbands can sit at the computer or drink beer after work while they have to do the cleaning, ironing and cooking. And what annoys you about your husband’s behavior?
Flirting is not always so innocent. All too frequently, playing with fire results in cheating, which, in its turn, brings unpleasant outcomes. Ragnar Beer, a famous psychologist from Goettingen, organized a research, interviewing 2600 people of both sexes who cheated on their significant other at least once. The results were shocking: most of the cheating men and women – over 80% to be exact – loved their partners.
1. Playing Around Lasts Longer Than a One Night Stand
The research destroyed the myth of traditional infidelity as a one-night stand. Only 12% of cheating women and 15% of men dared the adventure. The majority were faithful to their infidelity: nearly 60 percent of the respondents admitted their adulterous affair lasted longer than a month, and the rest – longer than half a year.
2. Infidelity to Be Continued…
Having cheated once, people will do again. Only 49% of unfaithful husbands and 55% of unfaithful wives cheated once in a committed relationship. 17% of men cheated on their spouses before entering into a relationship, 12% played the trick twice, and 22% – many a time. Women are keeping pace with men: 20% betrayed their husbands twice, and 10% – three times. 15% cuckolded their spouses more than three times.
3. Reason for Cheating – Suppression of Sexual Desires
Boredom and silence – these are the most common reasons why a partner seeks pleasure outside the marriage. For example, just 31% of cheating wives and 25% of cheating husbands were willing to discuss their sexual desires. By the way, only 27% of female cheaters and 17% of male cheaters knew their partner’s sexual needs.
4. Well-wishers Will Always Reveal Infidelity
A chance, on its own, doesn’t play a small part in disclosing a secret. 44% of deceived men (46% of women) uncovered cheating by themselves.
30% of betrayed men (24% of women) learnt from their partners that adultery took place.
Only 3% of men (6% of women) get the third-hand information.
21% of men (19% of women) spotted infidelity by chance.
5. An Infidelity Is Never Forgotten
The hopes that infidelity can be forgiven and forgotten failed.
43% of offended men (61% of offended women) were still not able to forgive their spouses in half a year after the affair became known. 11% of cheated men (20% of women) felt their love turning to hate in half a year after they experienced betrayal.
“It is impossible to get thoughts of infidelity out of head. But they can be prevented,” – doctor Beer claims.
Key to a Happy Marriage
The basis for successful relationship is sexual satisfaction for both partners. Couples should keep a close watch on their sexual needs, discuss problems and desires, and share exactly what they need. Nobody said it would be easy. But it is worth doing if you want your marriage to be happy.
Kissing is both pleasant and healthy, no doubt. But many scientists are still trying to answer the question why most people close their eyes when kissing. Here is what Singaporean scientist Yau Che Ming, a professor at the National Education Institute, thinks about that.
One of his theories suggests that we close our eyes to ease strong emotional pressure we experience when kissing. While it’s common to think that kissers close their eyes to escape from reality and to focus on their affectionate feelings. Another theory of the scientist goes about a person’s visual perception of his or her partner. Being so close, we either can’t see the face of our lover clearly, or we get it too clear. That visual perception often triggers unpleasant sensations and we close our eyes for protection.
Every woman dreams of great love. But once the dream comes true, we find it difficult to keep it after weeding ceremony. You know how marriage could be. Regular relationship is fading into no more than a habit, making spouses less interested and passionate. Finally, you get to know your spouse’s ways so well that some of them become annoying. Here are 6 simple rules for making tender feelings towards each other last for times to come.
You shouldn’t suppress your personal needs or keep your opinion to yourself just because of fear to destroy the harmony in a relationship. Indeed, even people in close relationship have the right to be different. Be yourself, respecting your spouse’s interests at the same time.
Let Your Partner Be What He Is
There is nothing wrong in fighting with your spouse from time to time. Storing up anger and discontent with your partner might be even worse. When your patience runs out, a big dust-up is going to happen with torrent of reproaches falling upon an unfortunate fellow. Sort out your relationship issues until they become a real problem. Clouds in the sky of your marriage are better than the storm. Your straight talk should last no more than 5 minutes. Try to be alone for 45 minutes after you had it. It will prevent both of you from uncontrolled fits of anger.
Don’t Hit a Sore Spot
We all have soft spots. Reference to them can hurt a person badly, triggering various worries from the fear of excessive weight and getting older to downsizing and failed career. Some people may still take their parent’s divorce hard as they grew older. Even strangers can hit a nerve. Yet only close people know exactly where it hurts so bad. Never misuse this knowledge.
Love cannot be managed, but it is possible to make tender affection last longer.
Don’t Lock Your Feelings Away
Live for today, not for the past or the future. Even so, think of something enjoyable you could do together. Try to seek out activities which will help you to learn something new about your lover and break “workplace-home” vicious circle.
Make Your Sex Life Fulfilling and Exciting
Things we get with no efforts, give us no satisfaction. This is true for sexual life as well. Hectic pace of modern life is trampling over passion. It might be great idea to stop for a second honeymoon.
Remember That Curiosity Is Not a Vice
Every woman is heading for the point in life where she thinks she knows everything about her spouse. Don’t delude yourself! Try to uncover something new and positive about your husband in the first place. Second, try to surprise your partner yourself.
Many people believe that when a wild romance ends up in a marriage, then the feelings eventually will burn out and the relationship will turn into habit. Moreover, there was a study which showed that love lasts at most for four years. However, is it always so? The Sunday Times newspaper reports that some scientists scanned the human brain and showed that eternal love can exist, thus rejecting the view that when a couple lives together for over fifteen months love, as a psychological and emotional feeling, starts to fade out.
Previously the scientists proved that when we communicate with someone we love, our body produces specific hormone – dopamine, which is responsible for “enjoyment of life”. However, according to a popular belief, as time passes the production of this hormone drops as we keep on communicating with our loved one and eventually, roughly in 10 years, the magic of love disappears.
However, this time the “no-eternal-love” belief was largely refuted! Scientists from the Stony Brook University, New York, scanned brains of married couples, who were happily married, and showed that the dopamine level in their brains was as high as that in people who just fell in love with each other.
So, don’t get fixed on the popular ideas about love and simply love each other for eternity!